Super Trendy?

I’d say “Call me oldfashioned” (or… Ishmael.. your choice) because I don’t like hopping on every bandwagon that rolls by but this is supposedly vintage, and it’s making my fingers scritch, so there’s a Paradox happening.
HINT TO DESIGNERS : Vintage patterns do not always survive the rebirth process.
So - this is The Paradox:

It’s *ahem* Vintage. [...]